i didnt sleep last night. so that would be two nights in a row i did not sleep. if i keep this up, i might just make it to the guiness book of records! right....
8am, went to college to have breakfast with widad. after that, hanged in the library for awhile and went to kat's apartment nearby to finish up our F&B project. after spending several hours there, went back to college. sookie got all pissy because of eve. sigh. so she just poured it all to me. i just sat in the mamak and listened to her. i did give a few words of advice to her. its so hard to understand humans sometimes. in a way, you would want them to change for the better, but they dont. they go back to their old roots. like i always say, old habits doesnt die easily.
after listening to her, she ate her lunch. when she finished eating, we went to the library and widad was there. so all 3 of us were studying for our accounts test thats coming up real soon. i got such a big headache, i stopped and read the papers. heheh yeah, stress relieve. then i took a short nap at a cubicle. widad woke me up and asked what time was i suppose to go to have dinner with eve, johnson and nick. i was like, i dont know. so i called eve and asked her. after that, went to the college restaurant and we had our meal. appetizer was crepe filled with mushroom and shrimps. main course was duck and dessert was choux pastry. overall its good but the portion was just too little. after that, i went home. sending widad home on the way. we just talked and talked. especially about eve. hahaha bitch talk about her. oh well, she deserves it. i mean, her attitude is just so ... wrong. i've been trying to help her since i knew her problem. but it seems that shes just hard to change.
so yeah. now im back home. not tired at all. weird but true. i dont think i will be sleeping again tonight. i think its becoming a routine. i dont think i should continue this. bad for my health and also my studies. sigh.
someone once told me, "it is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character." some how i agree with that person. i mean, even though you try as hard as you can, its just too hard to change someone. you would want that person to be the best of who they are. even though they are not with you. thats what i wanted for her. i wanted her to prove to herself that shes a changed woman. but i guess im just useless. i cant even help myself, why should i help others? i asked that to someone and that someone told me, "maybe you'd feel better helping someone else other than yourself first." hey, maybe its true. i dont know. i just feel that i want to help as much as i can. but maybe my type of help isnt what they are looking for. maybe they just want something else i cant offer. well, i know for a fact that this guy right here, has nothing to offer. he is your average joe. but with bad emotional problems. thats it.
i just wish i was really normal. i wish i was an average joe. i wish i could change who i am. but who am i to say? i am who i am. God created me this way and i shall live life like this. make full use of everything i have in me. be positive i always say. but somehow i pull myself so low, i wouldnt even know what is positive anymore. sigh.
rick.
8am, went to college to have breakfast with widad. after that, hanged in the library for awhile and went to kat's apartment nearby to finish up our F&B project. after spending several hours there, went back to college. sookie got all pissy because of eve. sigh. so she just poured it all to me. i just sat in the mamak and listened to her. i did give a few words of advice to her. its so hard to understand humans sometimes. in a way, you would want them to change for the better, but they dont. they go back to their old roots. like i always say, old habits doesnt die easily.
after listening to her, she ate her lunch. when she finished eating, we went to the library and widad was there. so all 3 of us were studying for our accounts test thats coming up real soon. i got such a big headache, i stopped and read the papers. heheh yeah, stress relieve. then i took a short nap at a cubicle. widad woke me up and asked what time was i suppose to go to have dinner with eve, johnson and nick. i was like, i dont know. so i called eve and asked her. after that, went to the college restaurant and we had our meal. appetizer was crepe filled with mushroom and shrimps. main course was duck and dessert was choux pastry. overall its good but the portion was just too little. after that, i went home. sending widad home on the way. we just talked and talked. especially about eve. hahaha bitch talk about her. oh well, she deserves it. i mean, her attitude is just so ... wrong. i've been trying to help her since i knew her problem. but it seems that shes just hard to change.
so yeah. now im back home. not tired at all. weird but true. i dont think i will be sleeping again tonight. i think its becoming a routine. i dont think i should continue this. bad for my health and also my studies. sigh.
someone once told me, "it is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character." some how i agree with that person. i mean, even though you try as hard as you can, its just too hard to change someone. you would want that person to be the best of who they are. even though they are not with you. thats what i wanted for her. i wanted her to prove to herself that shes a changed woman. but i guess im just useless. i cant even help myself, why should i help others? i asked that to someone and that someone told me, "maybe you'd feel better helping someone else other than yourself first." hey, maybe its true. i dont know. i just feel that i want to help as much as i can. but maybe my type of help isnt what they are looking for. maybe they just want something else i cant offer. well, i know for a fact that this guy right here, has nothing to offer. he is your average joe. but with bad emotional problems. thats it.
i just wish i was really normal. i wish i was an average joe. i wish i could change who i am. but who am i to say? i am who i am. God created me this way and i shall live life like this. make full use of everything i have in me. be positive i always say. but somehow i pull myself so low, i wouldnt even know what is positive anymore. sigh.
rick.
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